Yorkshire Ipsum

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I allus wash behind mi lugholes

Are'y reet? Dafteth Apeth. Aye up lass. He's a wrong'un like, Aye up lass. Am proper knackered, aye I am that is I say. Just nipping t' lavvy. He's a wrong'un like, Oh aye! Owt goin' on today lad, bes' be goin' yam. Theers nowt s'queer as folk. I allus wash behind mi lugholes. Are'y reet? Dafteth Apeth. Theers nowt s'queer as folk. 'am as 'appy as a pig in muck, like. Put wood inth 'ole, Yer flummoxed. Tha's getten tha'self in a pickle there lass. Tha meks a better door than a winder. By eckers, well, I'll go to't foot of't stairs! Put it on t'table Theers nowt s'queer as folk. I'm off down't road, I'm flaggin'. Now then, do as thy says, not as thy does. Now then, do as thy says, not as thy does. Aye up lass. By eckers, well, I'll go to't foot of't stairs! Put it on t'table Yer flummoxed. Yer flummoxed.

Oh aye! Owt goin' on today lad, bes' be goin' yam. Just nipping t' lavvy. Oh aye! Owt goin' on today lad, bes' be goin' yam. Just nipping t' lavvy. Fair t' middlin, this is. Ee bye ecky thump! He's a wrong'un like, I've got nowt to do today, I need summat to do. Oh aye! By eckers, well, I'll go to't foot of't stairs! By eckers, well, I'll go to't foot of't stairs! Aye up lass.

You're in luck m'boy! I'll do it missen Are'y reet? Dafteth Apeth. Do I 'eckers like, He's a wrong'un like, Yer flummoxed.

Are'y reet? Dafteth Apeth. How do? Eeh by gum, By eckers, well, I'll go to't foot of't stairs! Ee bye ecky thump! Tha's getten tha'self in a pickle there lass. Yer couldn't organise a set of fat bobbies. Were ya born in a barn, lad? Yer flummoxed.

Ear all, see all, say nowt. Eat all, sup all, pay nowt. Off f'r a sup down t'pub, to'neet. Now then, do as thy says, not as thy does. Fair t' middlin, this is. He's a wrong'un like, Fair t' middlin, this is. If in doubt-do nowt! Put it on t'table.